Pride and Prejudice: An Open Letter from a Christian about LGBTQ+
Dear friend,
It’s Pride Month, which means a parade downtown, rainbows everywhere, and increased awareness of the LGBTQ community and the “culture war”. Do you think it’s strange that we celebrate people’s sexual identities? I do. Even if all my friends were gay, I don’t think I’d walk around in a shirt proclaiming my straight-ness. It’s even stranger to devote a month to Pride, which is a negative character quality (and a sin). But I think I understand it. When we’ve been hurt or rejected by those close to us, we crave a place where people accept us…
…Because there is prejudice and homophobia. Many Christians stereotype, judge, and build unnecessary walls between themselves and those who identify as LGBTQ. I’m truly sorry. I’m sorry that Christians aren’t more hospitable. I’m sorry that Christian kids mock and bully. Christ broke bread with Judas, who betrayed Him, but many Christians don’t want to be in the same room with someone engaged in unbiblical sexual behavior. Ha, we aren’t that consistent. From what I’ve observed, Christians treat LGBTQ issues with much more fire and brimstone judgment than heterosexual adultery, divorce and remarriage, and pornography.
I remember when Christians called to boycott the live-action Beauty and the Beast for implied homosexuality. I then realized that many of the same families were fine with movies where characters have pre or extra-marital sex and fill pauses in the dialogue with passionate make-outs. They might skip a scene or two, but there’s no outrage that Hollywood dare show something anti-Christian. With people and movies alike — when a heterosexual person commits adultery we often accept them but disagree with their action. We separate the person from the sin (or the overall movie from the one character/scene). But when someone is homosexual, we identify and label the person by their sexual sin. There’s much hypocrisy and it’s damaged Christians’ moral credibility.
But just because there are hypocrites doesn’t mean that Christianity is wrong (just like the fact that gay pedophilia happens does not mean that the LGBTQ community is inherently predatory). Scripture and the Church are clear that homosexual behavior is a sexual sin for many reasons. One of which is that God designed sex to be sacred and life-giving. Homosexuality is not. Meaningful acts have rules and boundaries — if there are no boundaries, then there are no sacred spaces.
But “love is love!” I’m sorry, but that slogan doesn’t prove anything and doesn’t make sense. We’re still left wondering what love actually is. Our phrase should be, “God is Love” (I John 4:8). That means that love incorporates unconditional self-sacrifice (God gave Christ for our sins), justice (God punishes the wicked), and rules (God gave the law and moral boundaries). But Christian Love is also incredibly passionate. Read Song of Solomon in the Old Testament — it’ll make your fundamentalist friends turn red with embarrassment. Read John Donne’s poetry. Read T.S Eliot’s Four Quartets. Go to church, which is the marriage celebration of Christ and His people.
Speaking to those in the LGBTQ community, I want you to know that you are loved. Whatever you’ve done, whoever you say you are. God loves you. I love you. And it’s not a contradiction to love someone but refuse to accept their behavior. To love despite strong disagreement is a healthy aspect of family relationships and friendships. I hope you don’t reject Christianity because some Christians have hurt you. I hope you come to church and experience God’s love — and His beauty, goodness, and truth — for yourself.
Speaking as a conservative Christian, I challenge my Christian friends and myself: let’s stop making sexual orientation the whole of someone’s identity. No-one — whatever they identity as — should be reduced to one aspect of their life. We’re humans and we’re sexual, but we’re also more complex than who we’re attracted to. On a more positive note. Let’s do a better job modelling what God’s love is. Love unconditionally. Cultivate a good relationship with your family. Demonstrate that love is life-giving. If you start a family, work hard to make it safe, principled, happy, loving, and Godly. Open your doors and extend your table even to those radically different than you. Let’s remember that, as Dostoevsky said, “A loving humility is a terrible power.”
Reflectively,
Hannah
